Monday, March 26, 2012

Who Will She Marry?

We’re back again.

Leah is well.

Sometimes a little too well! :)

Honestly, we are still trying to figure out where we fit in.

Leah is still making huge strides!

Her only “real” delay is in her fine motor skills, and we’ve changed therapists to one who will hopefully help them improve.

Our previous therapist was a really wonderful woman, but she had limitations set for Leah, so Leah was limited. The new therapist is already challenging Leah, she understands my desire to push Leah, and she will not give her an excuse because she has Down syndrome.

Before I made the change official, I spoke to the therapist to make sure she understood my wishes.

She did!

Leah is really amazing.

She has the appearance of Down syndrome.

She has the traits associated with Down syndrome.

She has some health concerns which are common with those who have Down syndrome.


She is cognitively at an age appropriate level.

She speaks at an (almost) age-appropriate level.

Physically, she is only minorly delayed.

She is severely delayed in her fine motor skills, but I know that will change pretty rapidly with this new therapist, just as it did when we switched to an appropriate level of services with her new physical therapist.

But, Leah has Down syndrome.

None of her accomplishments are common with children who have Down syndrome.

All kids have unlimited potential, including those with disabilities.

But, Leah is shattering a glass ceiling.

Most of her friends are too, but not as quickly.

Those who shared the same level of accomplishments a year ago are falling behind.

It is so hard for me to brag because I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.

I don’t want people to think I am boasting or prideful.

I don’t want to seem like I’m ever saying my kid is better than anyone else’s.

I don’t want to ever hurt anyone’s feelings…

But, I’m a Mama, and what Mama doesn’t want to brag?!

My heart is sad every time I see someone comment on my Facebook posts that they wished their child did what Leah was doing.

I wish they were too!

I wish we were all experiencing the same miracles.

I wish all of our kids were so healthy.

I wish I knew where we fit in.

We don’t fit in with typical kids because Leah has Down syndrome, we don’t fit in with kids who have Down syndrome because Leah is so untypical.

I know I’ve said this before, but it really is a difficult place to be in.

I wonder who Leah will marry?


Say she continues on her same path.

Say she has a normal IQ and becomes a teacher or something?

What typical boy would want to marry a girl who has Down syndrome?

And honestly, if she is typical in every way besides her appearance, would she want to marry a boy who has Down syndrome?

I just see her heart getting broken.

And, it breaks my heart.

Don’t get me wrong, I am incredibly grateful for the amazing blessings we have been given.

I will be happy with any boy Leah chooses to marry, as long as he is a good boy, and LDS! ;)

I am as impressed with Leah as anyone else is, but I have to understand her limits too.

What mom doesn’t think about who their kids will marry every now and then.

But, who is she limited to?

Where do we fit in?

How do we take joy in our accomplishments when they don't fit in with anyone else's?

Who can we share all of our joy with when no one is at the same place?

Leah's delays make her obviously behind typical kids.

Leah's accomplishments make her ahead of kids with Down syndrome.

If there is someone out there who understands willl you please introduce yourself?!

We could really use some friends right now.

I am tired of comparing Leah, or having Leah compared to other kids and I just want to fit in somewhere!