When people comment about this blog, the thing they comment about the most is my ability to share my feelings.
Like it’s something special.
This has me curious.
Why is it unique that I can voice my feelings?
Should I keep them quiet?
Do others keep their emotions to themselves?
Why?
Being a parent of a child with a disability is a very tough job. It can be, “all sunshine and flowers,” but sometimes it’s not.
I have friends who are experiencing this whole parenting thing for the very first time and won the Ds lottery.
I have friends who are experiencing this whole parenting thing for the very first time and won the Ds adoption lottery.
I am one who is experiencing this whole parenting thing for the fifth time but this is my first lotto win…
…and it’s hard!
So why keep it to myself. It’s not like I keep the good things to myself; I share them everywhere I can.
We have to own our feelings.
We have to accept them.
Very few of us really want our children to have a disability.
We don’t want to see them struggle.
We don’t want to have to fight for them.
We don’t want people to stare and whisper.
We don’t want people to feel sorry for us.
We don’t want to ask, “Why?”
But it all happens, and it’s tough.
Regardless of if you are a first time parent, adoptive parent, or a parent of multiple kids, you are a parent first. Your emotions are valid. You deserve to acknowledge them. You deserve to feel them and to work through them.
And so do your kids…
Saying that, “Sometimes being a parent of a child with special needs is not fun,” is being honest. But that doesn’t mean that you love your kids any less then any other parent. It is tough. It’s rough. I wish that I didn’t have to do it.
BUT…
I love being a parent to Leah and yes, there is a difference.
Leah is amazing and beautiful.
She is smart and silly.
She makes me proud.
Dealing with all the stuff that is thrown at me because of Down syndrome, stinks. But
I gotta do it because I love her and she needs me to.
That doesn’t mean I have to like it though…
Its not that other mothers cant share their feelings it could be they just can't articulate their feelings like you do. And reading some ones same feelings that you have been experiencing is such a relief that you are doing your best but things still happen.
ReplyDeleteYou are a great Mommy!
ReplyDeleteThat is a great point Savina. I didn't think of that. I don't really think I am that articulate but I have to get these feelings out and journaling is the best way I found to do that. I share it because I want others to know how it feels and maybe those who arn't experiencing this will soften their hearts just a little for us.
ReplyDeleteI was chatting with a friend and she said that she didn't feel like she was allowed to have those feelings because she "chose" her child. that made me sad and I wanted to make sure no one else felt like this. It is my way of giving everyone an "out". :) Thanks for your insight!
Thanks Emily! You are too! :)
I just found your blog from another that I read regularly. My daughter Emily is one year old and also has DS. I am your newest follower :-)
ReplyDelete